


sunflower boy

by horizsan



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, M/M, No Sexual Content, Sort Of, hongjoong is compared to a sunflower a lot, i don't really know how to tag this, i guess, i wanted to post one more thing today before i go to bed, it's dusty and there's a sunflower field, it's just a drabble meant to be pretty and plotless, so here have this, sorta angsty? i think?, there's a lot of metaphors, this doesn't have a lot of plot to it, this is just me waxing poetic about hongjoong and sunflowers and the sun and the moon, this takes place in the literal middle of nowhere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:47:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25775362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/horizsan/pseuds/horizsan
Summary: But Seonghwa still waits, because that’s the thing about sunflower boys, they’ll leave you not knowing how to do anything else.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	sunflower boy

**Author's Note:**

> i don't really know what this is. i'd originally intended it to go in a very different direction from where it went, and it was originally supposed to be written in a pretty different style from this. but i traipsed my little fingers across a keyboard and this came out, and i actually really like it, so i hope you guys do too!
> 
> this doesn't really have a lot of plot to it at all, it's very vague and ambiguous, but i hope you enjoy it regardless!
> 
> \+ abby <3

There are advantages to living in the middle of nowhere, especially when you’re like Seonghwa, and don’t particularly enjoy the company of other people. In the middle of nowhere, there aren’t a lot of other people to spend your time in the company of, and the few that there are are probably just as sick of you as you are of them, and they just make small talk with you when they have to so as not to be rude. Seonghwa likes this, likes the cold aloofness that everyone around here regards one another with. He doesn’t have to put on airs often, and when he does, it’s never for long, and it’s not unbearable. It’s perfect. Just the way he likes things.

There are rarely new people to put on airs for, which is a good thing, because if there’s one thing Seonghwa hates more than making boring small talk, it’s making boring and awkward small talk with complete strangers. But every so often, someone will pass through, and on an even rarer occasion, someone new will arrive, to stay. Or so they say. They never truly stay for good, eventually realizing that this place is not for them, and then they leave, without much of a trace, the wind blowing away their retreating footsteps in the dirt within an hour or so.

Seonghwa wasn’t aware someone new had arrived when it happened, but then again, he hadn’t really spoken to anyone in a few days, and the people around here never were the type to gossip and make a big deal out of anything. He didn’t know anyone new had come through, whether temporarily or “to stay”, but he knows now. Not because anyone told him, but because he saw the boy. He would say man, but he doesn’t look a day over Seonghwa’s own age of barely twenty one, and Seonghwa doesn’t really consider himself to quite be a man yet, so boy it is. Seonghwa saw him wandering through the sunflower fields at the edge of town, only a few times, just a quick glimpse each time, but even just those split-second sightings told Seonghwa that this boy did not belong here.

This place was not meant for boys that bright, that vibrant. Seonghwa had never spoken to him, so of course, he knew nothing of the boy’s personality, but he could guess. Seonghwa’s grandmother had always told him you could tell a lot about a person by their hair, and if this boy’s bright, unnaturally red hair was any hint as to his nature, this place was not the place for him. He would be tied down too tight here, and he was for sure the type to lay his head back and let the waves carry him along, rather than staying in one place for extended periods of time. At least, according to his hair.

Seonghwa had only seen him enough times to be able to count on one hand, but he knew. This boy would be just as temporary as everyone else who claimed they were here to stay. He found himself wishing that this were not the case, against every instinct in his mind and body. Regardless of whether the boy was destined to be only temporary or not, he certainly was beautiful. Seonghwa would use the word “pretty”, but it didn’t seem strong enough.

He wasn’t just pretty. He was  _ beautiful _ . Seonghwa had only ever caught the tiniest of glimpses of his facial features (always in the sunflower fields, Seonghwa only ever saw him among the stalks that stood higher than the tips of that red hair, never anywhere else), but he had seen enough to know. The way his nose was sharp in the most ethereal way, blending perfectly with the rest of his features. The way his cheekbones curved on his skull, the skin laying over it looking impossibly soft and smooth. The way that red hair fell across his forehead in the slightest of waves, only lending further to Seonghwa’s theory about the boy's go-with-the-flow nature. The way his lips curved around a smile that almost looked like he had more teeth than a person normally should, but it worked for him somehow, suiting him perfectly.

He was just like those sunflowers, Seonghwa thought, constantly turning to face wherever the sun was, smiling up at the light like it was the focal point of his existence. It was like the sun brought him joy, and Seonghwa for the life of him couldn’t fathom why, all the sun ever brought him was frustration in the form of a shirt soaked through with sweat and skin that felt like it was baking under the incessant heat. There was a part of Seonghwa that had always known he was going to be temporary, and he curses himself even now for letting himself be drawn toward that sunflower boy, knowing he only looked towards the moon (Seonghwa) because there was no sun to turn his head towards, and knowing that once there was a sun in the sky once more, that sunflower boy would never turn that lovely head in his direction again.

There are advantages to living in the middle of nowhere, especially when things like Hongjoong happen to you, when you let yourself fall in love with a sunflower who’s only looking at the moon (you) because there’s nothing else to look at here. When things like Hongjoong leave, leave you lying on your back in the middle of a sunflower field staring up at the stars as if they’ll comfort you, it’s easy to pick yourself back up, to rise to your feet once more, because no one will bother you about it. It was easy for Seonghwa to pick himself up, brush himself off, and carry on like nothing had ever happened, or at least, it was easy for him to act like it was easy.

That’s the thing about sunflower boys, they’ll mesmerize you whether you like it or not, and when they turn away, they’ll leave you staring after them like you’ve become the sunflower and them the sun. You’ll stare in the direction they went when they left forever, waiting in pitiful futility for a return that will never happen. Seonghwa stares in that direction still, still walks by the sunflower fields daily, hoping he’ll catch a glimpse of that red hair again, craning his neck like a sunflower to his sun, but the difference between that great big burning ball of gas in the sky and Hongjoong is that the sun will always rise again tomorrow morning, but Hongjoong is gone, on to the next fleeting destination, and there’s no guarantee that he’ll ever rise here again.

But Seonghwa still waits, because that’s the thing about sunflower boys, they’ll leave you not knowing how to do anything else.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you enjoyed! if you did, feel free to leave a comment with your thoughts!
> 
> i hope you're all having/had a good day/night, and i hope you will have a good day/night ahead of you! i hope everyone is doing well and staying safe, and don't forget to hydrate yourselves, eat well, and get plenty of sleep! i love you <3
> 
> \+ abby


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